Socioeconomically? The foundation of any effort to get your ex boyfriend back starts and ends with the no contact rule - which means you probably shouldn't be texting with him in the first place. Tell me, how can I face my problems when the problem is my face? Martin holds a Masters degree in Finance and International Business. Save it for your best friend, but avoid using it on your teacher. I havent met the right one yet. In reality, "How are you?" could be more than just a . (Wriggle your hips) I am as happy as a tick on a big, fat doggy. Congratulations, sir. Don Draper? Some people spend all their time on their phone. 3. 27. 59. What Is A Micro Wedding And How To Plan It? Do you really care? Just because you're using the "what if" format doesn't mean you can ask anything. (Wriggle your hips), Oh, stop it, will you? It would be easy to answer that question with a simple "I'm fine, thank you.". Oof, gotta hide! [Read: How to be funny and make people love your company]. As unlikely as this is, it might be wise to double-check. Looks like I overestimated the number of brain cells you have. No one will expect to hear it, so you'll be catching your friends off guard. Holy s**t, you can see me?! still alive 810 GIFs. Things You Should Know about Birth Control Pills 62 Beautiful Makeup Inspos for Girls Who Are Not Afraid to Play with Color "Like an echo asking a shadow to dance on a mirage, this one is even funnier when an ugly person says, My friend always says "gooder". Do you want the short or the detailed version? I wrote him a cheque for it, post-dated of course. Chic Murray (comedian), When I die, I hope to go to heaven, whatever the hell that is. Ayn Rand (author), The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesnt get worse every time congress meets. Will Rogers (actor), "My grandmother was a very tough woman. Turning the question around on them without actually having to answer? In reality, they are not cool, they are just rude. With a self-assured stance and casual body language, you won't create any . funny response to are you still alive 09 June 2022. no disease, including cancer, can exist in an alkaline environment / siberian husky mask types *Siri activates front camera*. Physically? No, keep talking. You go first, lets see if mine was better or worse. 4. Want to equip yourself with more responses? What should I doI like you too much. I'm happy! Still, the ghosters ghost on. [Read: How to have playful banter and keep the flirting alive forever]. There's no reason why you should have to express emotions to whoever asked. 24. The best GIFs are on GIPHY. Edgar A Shoaff (author), "Death is a very narrow theme, but it reaches a wide audience." 1. Cookie Notice Brilliant! #19: Bumble comeback The best comeback text yet. You a cop? Theyre incapacitated when it comes to sending a simple text, yet they can Insta their whole day. I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. Because apparently, you need to go outside and talk to people to date. If youre still single, some people will ask you for a reason or explanation, in one way or another. 6. 45. I'm fine. If I was any better, vitamins would be taking me. "It's your ego that wants to lash out," Winter tells Bustle. You might just find one. 64. Ill get back to you tomorrow when the results are in. Why not laugh about it and allow it to bring us closer together? Trying to remember the name of that weird person you remind me of. Keep asking and maybe one day youll get a sensible answer. 10. Do you have a minute? is perfect for lunch-time banter with colleagues. Whats with all these questions? Copyright 2011 - 2023 IncNut Stylecraze Private Limited. Ghosting is an unfortunately very common occurrence, according to a 2020 Hinge survey, which found that 91% of users had been ghosted at least once. You'll be asked how you are almost every single day, which is why you should add some humor to your answers. Great, but I should warn you that I am totally biased. She works with her clients to help them evolve in their problem areas and find new meaning in their lives, thus finding the best versions of themselves. Are you going to marry me? 40. Thats because I get about as much attention as a white crayon. Hope you're well". Make sure the person you say this to is able to take a joke. You are about as interesting as a documentary on dirt. Thats why Im single. I dont follow boys/girls because theyre not my passion. If someone is going to ask you the same old everyday questions, I dont think Im being unreasonable when I say theyre probably just going through the motions and not really interested in your answer. The living are getting rarer. Eugene Lonesco (playwright), Dying is easy; its living that scares me to death. Annie Lennox (musician), If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the UP button. Sam Levenson (humorist), Ive looked that old scoundrel death in the eyes many times but this time I think he has me on the ropes. Douglas MacArthur (general), Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up. Wilson Mizner (playwright), The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades, especially if your teammates are bad guessers. Demetri Martin (comedian), I intend to live forever or die trying. Groucho Marx (comedian), Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it. William Somerset Maugham (author), The art of dying graciously is nowhere advertised in spite of the fact that its market potential is great. Milton Mayer (author), At my age, I do what Mark Twain did. No, they're prison pants. Make sure you give witty responses only to persons close to you, or you know they wont get offended by such responses. There are nosy people everywhere! Im still trying to figure out an answer to that question if Im honest. Going strong. In My Phone or On My Phone Which is Correct? While using humor and creativity in your responses is fun, ensure you steer clear from using puns related to religion and sensitive topics. You are shocked by his/her response, and you respond angrily "but what about me?". 32. That's boyfriend material. I was actually talking to my friend". I plead the fifth. 6. Doing fairly well, unless you have some contagious disease and are about to infect me . Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. 55. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping." "Can't complain" is a normal response to the question, but by throwing in the following sentence, you should get a laugh. Stellar, great, fantastic but dead inside. 20. 15. The music billboard charts got it wrong! It looks like your face caught fire and someone tried to put it out with a baseball bat. My lawyer told me not to answer that question. 29. 12. What do you say when people ask you that? 382 Likes, 344 Comments. Speak Now Or Forever Hold Your Peace: What Does It Mean? Same thing you're doing, talking to you now. This one is good. Id love to give you a nasty look, but it appears you already have one. I firmly believe that a romantic relationship is a huge distraction. 9. If you are in a coma, on the other hand, you are legally very much alive. Get your own life first before you try sharing it. 41. Because youre highly qualified. I like being single. Youre not really expecting them to write you an essay. Because your ass is out of this world! I dont think youre stupid. Id hug and kiss you if you were single, just like me. Taco Tuesday is pressure enough, I tell you! Before you complain about anything, be thankful for your life and the things that are still going well.". 13. Sort: Relevant Newest # living # seth meyers # im here # its me # lnsm # tired # dead # shot # arrows # loser # hello # hi # hey # tap # listen # alive # pearl jam # eddie vedder # i'm good # i'm ok alive # dead meat # tremors # kill count # survived # reaction # united states of al # dean norris # unitedstatesofal # you only live once reaction # united states of al # dean norris # unitedstatesofal # you only live once By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. The 'Sex And The City' Cab Light Theory, Revisited, It's Hot When People Call You By Your Last Name, I Never Feel Older Than When I Try To Make A TikTok, Get Even More From Bustle Sign Up For The Newsletter. This is the perfect time for you to become a missing person. Oh, stop it, will you? If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. Listen, maybe your crush really did lose their phone. When you look at what some people have done for each other and compare it to what you expect. Physically? I see youve chosen this time to humiliate yourself in public. 8. This one kills me! [Read: 33 very creative insults to intellectually insult someone with your sarcasm]. Awwits so cute when you talk about things you dont understand. Living the dream! Funny give back answer for who are your ex boyfriends? This is one of those worst epic responses to I love you makes us feel for the poor love-struck fellow. You don't want others to assume that you feel as horrible as you look, so this is the way to set them straight. Thats the biggest joke Ive heard recently. Your response should depend on the rapport you share with the sender. Average, I think, that sounds about right. I text the same message ' are you alive' when I haven't heard from them in a while. 9 Best Ways To Ask Someone To Talk On The Phone, 9 Other Ways to Say Im Good At on a Resume, 10 Polite Ways to Say No Visitors after Surgery, 11 Best Ways to Say Im Here for You to a Loved One, 10 Professional Ways to Say I Am Not Feeling Well. Because they are already taking their time. Like seriously, you hoped for him to be run over by a truck or something. I'm glad to know that you're alive.". I didnt realize it at first, but I grew up and turned into a Squidward. Figuring out how to respond to a ghoster is all a matter of accepting whats done. 65. HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. "Ugh I was so lazy this week. She works wit more, Harini Natarajan , Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner, Expertise: Relationships, Beauty & Lifestyle, Health & Wellness, As Head Of Content Operations, Harini sets the tone and editorial direction for StyleCraze to deliver engaging, interesting, and authentic content revolving around women's health, wellness, and beauty more. It could be raining men, and Id still be single. This way, youre insulting themand they just might be dumb enough not to notice. When you show them how you're not affected by them at all, that's when your comedic skills become the best and make others laugh as well. Trying to understand the meaning of life or the universe at least. Funny and Clever Answers to "Why Are You Still Single?". Hanging on. It lets him know that you love spending time together. Im not ready to share my food with anyone yet. I think I am doing alright. If your crush asks you how you are, you might as well be honest. I am not sure what you mean. The fact youve replied at all has come as a shock. If this is the person youre talking to, just insure them that you are aware they are not away from their phone. Financially? conservation international ceo; little debbie peanut butter creme pies discontinued. Then the worms eat you. He sold it to me on his deathbed. Arthur lived a short life, but none could doubt that it was a good one. But still, some people will try to satisfy their curiosity and meddle with your personal life. A A A Remember the time when you hated your ex too much that you wanted him dead? Funny as phuck. Financially? 2 I ask for your birth chart one time, and suddenly, I'm a mind-reading witch that knows what you're thinking. The police? 9. Im jealous of people who dont know you. 3. parkerbilly 3 yr. ago. 26+ Funny Responses to Being Asked on a Date (Replying Yes or No), 31+ Good Comebacks to Use in an Argument With a Girl, Roommate Is Always in Living Room (How To Resolve This), Roommate Brings Unwanted Guests Home! No, I'm Finnish. Clever comebacks not only showcase your distastethey demonstrate your intelligence, too. 350 opinions shared on Guy's Behavior topic. 94. Sometimes, being emotional stops us from replying to the messages of others. 18. The answer to this question has become so generic it feels like there is an auto-complete machine in our heads! Whether its the Roman empire or feudal society. Steven Wright (comedian). Hopefully, not as good as I will ever be. Death is inevitablesome might even say it is a terminal inconvenience or a reason to suddenly stop sinning. Im reminded of how unfair life is every time I see you. You don't need to miss them, because you are willing to travel to them, and kiss them. If I wanted to commit suicide, Id climb your ego and jump to your IQ level. Im too expensive. As for me, I cant even afford honey! Its not my choice, but its still a choice. 98. Relationship expert Susan Winter recommends gracefully leaving as the quickest and easiest way out. Hey, I can see straight to the back of your head when I look into your eyes! How do you think that I am doing? If receiving a text from your ex elicits strong negative feelings, it is best not to respond. Another way to say Still Alive? Why dont you tell me, you seem to have a pretty good view from there. (This line came from the cartoon show. Here are some of the most humorous replies to "How are you? Its going great, really! 53. When someone really finds you funny over text, they may send laughing emoji or 'haha'. Like are you asking because you really wanna hear whats up?. I'm afraid I can't do that. 2 I'm Still on the Right Side of the Grass As long as you're still breathing, you can use this reply. Take Your Time. No, waitIm actually plural. 74. It's Okay. Watch the video: Only 1 percent of our visitors get these 3 grammar questions right 30 Best Responses To An Apology For A Late Reply. Funny Answers to "Why Are You Still Single?" Because no one worthy has beaten me yet in a card fight! This person is taking so long to reply, you will be waiting for geology to change before you get one. I had been dead for billions of years before I was born and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience. Mark Twain (author), Im not afraid to die, I just dont want to be there when it happens. Woody Allen (comedian), The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. Dave Barry (author), Always go to other peoples funerals, otherwise they wont come to yours. Yogi Berra (baseball player), Im very pleased to be here. People tend to ask the same questions whenever you see them, which is why you should have a few different replies to "How are you?" *licks lips*. Yup, I dont share it. My standards are higher than what Ive seen lately. My day was fine, it was everything else that was the problem. Voice command: Alexa, I am your father. 6. Who knows, maybe you can steer a conversation in a more intriguing path. Hence, you may need to put in some effort to keep the conversation flowing. (perfect for vegans). Socioeconomically? Thats funny, because everyone on it is a prick. They used to call them jumpolines, until your mom jumped on one. Id punch you in the face, but the thought of touching your face disgusts me. Use them as you see fit when someone pokes their nose on your relationship status. I dont blame you, Ive had it up to my neck with annoying, repetitive, shallow everyday questions and I often respond with something funny, silly, or sarcastic to make it known. 1. Here are 28 of the best ghosting responses to send someone whos been ignoring you. And trust us, once you use these lines, everyone will be ooh-ing to your snarky comments the next time someone dares to make fun of you! Because Jamaican me crazy! Scroll down! I was doing great, before you came. Thats because the person I like doesnt like me back. Definitely will catch your casual convo counterpart off guard and will probably bring a chuckle. Well, I have to go to work so Ill try and make the best of it. You can use variations, such as, "Well enough to chat with you if you wish.". I am better on the inside than I look on the outside. Getting into a romantic relationship with someone may seem like a good idea, but so was getting into Titanic. 2. Truth is, we all have ugly experiences with our past lovers. 17. You want to make them laugh, not yell. Its the same reason why I dont post pictures of myself. In fact, theyre taking too much of it. No one loves superheroes. However, it is best to stick to the basics with a colleague. Ive never seen such a small mind inside such a large head before. If ignorance barrel prices go up, I want drilling rights to his head. Single is the new blackif that even makes sense! Not sure why you're asking me my age. You just have bad luck at thinking. 01 "I thought we were both adults but clearly, I was wrong. There are many other euphemisms you could use, though: Still ticking. Tip #3 - Confidence is Key. The following responses dont require wit, but do require a funny bone. I dont mind you talking so much, as long as you dont mind me not listening. Let them know that you're itching to go on a date. Alive Jokes. I do admite that sometimes I hate life, sometimes my hate being in the world! Trying to remember the name of that weird person you remind me of. 62. I hear good things; however, you should never listen to rumors. Shooting yourself in front of the person who asked. Here are some funny, witty, snarky, smart, and sarcastic responses to some of those annoying everyday questions its hard to avoid: I couldnt possibly cover all of the annoying everyday questions that are probably chipping away at you, but here are some of the most popular: Related 26+ Funny Responses to Being Asked on a Date (Replying Yes or No), Related 29+ Funny Responses to Compliments. . This answer is correct because the best responses to "how are you" should contain an adverb.
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