You know, you were not adopted. It was a different way of living, one that she admires. It was a different way of living, one that she admires. You're their kid. I remember talking to Mother about, you know, this is your blood daughter. And when Mrs. Miller finally let everybody know the truth, long after both girls were grown up with children of their own, it was disruptive. She looked exactly like him. That's Ruth she and Faith and Mary Lydia. They said that was a cop out. Creator/showrunner Lizzy Weiss, director Jeff Byrd and actress Bianca Bethune discuss the intense debates on set, the scene . And, you know, because I wonder what's going to happen when my parents are gone. The infants were accidentally switched, and went home with the wrong families. Well, there was no DNA testing back then or anything else. Again, Martha Miller, who now goes by Marty, who once was the baby who sneezed five times in a row. And what was what was your your room like you in your own room to our room. All the Millers were invited and all the McDonalds were to Marty considered whether she should go. Our senior producer for this episode is Julie Snyder, music from Jessica Hopper. The infants were accidentally switched, and went home with the wrong families. The. As for Marty, she doesn't like to dwell on the notion that Sue might have been the one who lucked out. She's a very busy gal, and I was not having that much communication with her. I can still wonder why and probably never will know why it didn't come up any sooner. Going the normal way, like most [INAUDIBLE]? ", So she's basically saying to you, you may have actually gotten a break here being in the family that--. Bay grew up in a wealthy family while Daphne, who lost her hearing as a child, was raised by a single mom in a working class neighborhood. And you can see, they're just having so much fun and laughing together and just dancing away. That's Ruth. From the McDonald's perspective, Marty looked and acted remarkably like a McDonald's. I remember my friend said to me, you must be adopted because you do not look at all like your parents. Marti says she felt like everything she was interested in was lost on her parents. Her name is also Sue. And she would circle their names and say, these are your parents. And I wanted to be a cheerleader. And when I think of my mother, I think of her. The other mother, Kay McDonald, had no idea. This American Life. Switched at Birth. It'll be all right. And I don't know that she was as excited about it as I was. They decided that Ruth ought to have a look to so the two girls cooked up a reconnaissance mission on one Sunday, they got their boyfriends to drive them 17 miles away to the McDonald's church in Prairie Dasheen. It was the first I had ever heard anything about it. Even if she could somehow convince everyone it was true, what would happen if you suddenly took a six-month-old away from the only mother she knew? After all those years, she was just tired of secrets. And when I think of my mother, I think of her. We're not mad simply because these two made such a stellar job portraying the main characters. And to you, Martha. Well, sure, I guess, a little built of guilt, but it's not my fault. It is the first television show to feature several deaf actors/characters and entire scenes shot using only ASL. The final episode of the Peabody-winning family drama ended things by looking back at how the series. One of the most popular episodes of National Public Radio's "This American Life" is titled "Switched at Birth". So I left practicing and I was driving. Mr. Miller died in 2000. She looked exactly like him. She circled his name and she wrote, This is your uncle. Kay is no longer angry the way she was, but she says she'll never understand why Mrs Miller stayed silent for all those years. He's just outright he's just saying, can you forgive me just just like that on the telephone. And he did, and he did. For this assignment, listen to the Prologue, Act 1, and Act 2 of the This American Life episode #360 called Switched at Birth. And as you heard in the letter, one thing that makes this whole thing even stranger is that the two couples knew each other. Occasionally, she'd break down and cry. At the hospital in 1951, Kay MacDonald was told that she'd given birth to a nine pound, four ounce baby. And I said, heavens no. It's hard enough to learn that your mother isn't your mother, but it's even harder when that news is delivered by someone like Mrs. Miller. And I said, would you have believed me? And I was in the hallway and Mrs. Miller said to me, Did you ever think that our girls were switched at birth? They say they're not angry with her. And then she's going to say, well, I don't need that daughter anymore. Shut up. And whenever Marti comes to my hometown, she stays with my brother. They understand what their relationship was like. Reverend Miller had made many visits to Dr. Dislocates wife when she was sick, and now Dr. Deathlok refused to charge the Millers for anything. I knew there were things that I couldn't do and keep his friendship, you know, if I turned against him, like on that. I didn't have anything to do with it. I said, I think we-- it's not right to do that, to keep somebody else's baby. Marti worked all of her adult life, and still does, as a nurse. I don't know why they didn't notice that Marta looked like them and looks like them. While Bay and Daphne were supposed to be 15 at the time, Vanessa and Katie were 18 and 24, respectively. So the two girls cooked up a reconnaissance mission. Two teenage girls' lives are turned upside down when they find out they were switched at birth. I think what we do is pretty much our own doing. And all needed glasses for nearsightedness, Martha did not need glasses. Text. At last, Mrs. Miller felt free to act. But that's pretty much where it ends. I was just not ever meeting their expectation of intellectual ism, and my mother has told me since then, you know, you I really didn't expect that much from you because I knew that you weren't our child. And after dinner, he got to talking. Well, of course, they were really clamoring to get to know her. In fact, she seemed to have a tin ear for the whole thing. Transcript; Share; This American Life. It is hosted by Ira Glass, produced in collaboration with Chicago Public Media, delivered to stations by PRX The Public Radio Exchange, and has won all of the major broadcasting awards. When Kay's church was celebrating its 150th anniversary, for instance, Kay was chairperson for the event. And then they go right to do that. It is based on the true story of Kimberly Mays and Arlena Twigg, babies switched soon after birth in a Florida hospital in 1978. In a pretty lighthearted household, she was nervous, studious, serious. He was an odd strategy, if you can even call it that. I tried out for cheerleading, I just couldn't do it, you know, I didn't get picked. And he did, in fact, say some hurtful things. No, we didn't argue about that. I'm really a Miller, you know, what does she think of me? That's what most people in town seem to feel, it wasn't their place to bring up such a thing, especially with no way to know if it was true for sure. When I weighed the baby, she weighed two and a half pounds less than her birth weight. Katie Leclerc and Adam Hagenbuch in "Switched at Birth.". Our staff for today's show includes Alex Blumberg, Sarah Koenig, Seth Lind, Lisa Pollak, Robin Semien, Alissa Shipp, Matt Tierney, Nancy Updike, and Diane Wu. This was the side of the family she was raised with, but she seemed tense, watching as Marti made the rounds, everybody laughing. What if the switch hadn't been made, but if the McDonald's had just taken me home and I had grown up in the house with my biological parents, my biological brother, who would I be? So of course, we were elated when I did get pregnant. And, you know, because I wonder what's going to happen when my parents are gone. The way she pronounced her words were identical with the way my mother talked. At the Beginning This true story started in the early 1950's when two girls were born at the same hospital in a Wisconsin town. And yeah, I think it might be. That's how long it took her to sort out her feelings. She was working for a group of pediatricians, which included a genetic counselor. My mom said, oh, well, you just take after great-grandpa this or aunt so-and-so. "Dear Sue, I'm writing you this short note to officially give you my welcome to this Miller family and relationship.". I didn't get picked. And Sue seems eager to know them. From WBEZ Chicago, it's "This American Life." Did you feel that then after this happened a little bit closer to your dad than your mom? That's Martha reading. And but at the same time, she says when she refers to Kay, she says, well, your mother is doing such and such. That was enough. You know, it was it was good for us to laugh. And much later, when she was in her mid-30s, she decided to get to the bottom of it. And so I kind of made a promise to myself that. For Sue, her brother's enthusiasm for Marti brought out every insecurity she suffered as a schoolgirl. Before she found out the truth about who her mother really was, Marti's life wasn't all that different from Sue's. Once things calmed down, Sue came to two conclusions. Mrs. Miller has for 43 years been longing to see her, the child she'd given birth to. The family did all kinds of hobbies, painting and rock polishing and 3D photography. Reverend Miller. Oh, yeah. I'm IRA Glass. And I said, Who told you to say that? Jun In the room that we slept in the through the register to get to the bathroom, you had to go under the bed and crawl like a dog door. The two little girls ended up in wrong families and only became aware of their biological parents 43 years later when Mrs. Miller decides to write a letter to them . So he and Mrs. Miller were invited and the Millers came. She wanted to be a part of a big family. In fact, it was the exact opposite. Rudy had a couple of beers. 754. I'm IRA Glass back next week with more stories. Kay was angry that Mrs. Miller hadn't corrected things back in 1951, that Mrs. Miller had hijacked her life in this way. She didn't fit in. It's all your fault. Marti says her mom, Mrs. Miller, sees the world in black and white. It was the first time I'd seen them talk to each other. I just couldn't believe it. Marty wrote a letter to Kay and Bob McDonald, her biological parents. Jake Halpern, he's the host of the new podcast Deep Cover, about an FBI agent who goes undercover with an outlaw motorcycle gang. "I want you to know that I will accept whatever contact you choose to have with me, even if it's none at all. The Millers wanted to incorporate her family into our family as quickly as they could. Because it was terrible that hang over your head and. You know, I would I was just like, wow, you know, wow. As years went by, when there were family events with everyone, Sue would get anxious if Marty was there to. This American Life, I'm IRA Glass. I kind of felt like Bob and Kay were kind of keeping me at an arm's distance, because they weren't really sure how they felt or wanted to feel. They say they're not angry with her. And in the meantime, I had gotten phone calls from people I didn't even know that we're telling me, hey, I'm your brother. I was shy or I was whatever. S1 E1 - This Is Not a Pipe Bay and Daphne discover that they were switched at birth. And so I don't think that was too well received when I mentioned that. Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors. And I thought I was losing both of them. It was an odd strategy, if you can even call it that. No, no, no. And until that time, we just talked all the time with every phone call that we made. She heard it first from her own mom, who heard it at church. TV-14 | 06.13.11 | 43:33 | CC more episodes 01:03:04 S5 E10 - Long Live Love Bay is finally recognized as a successful artist. All the girls were in the same room. It wouldn't work. But there's no question things have gotten better between the two girls and their moms. Reporter Jake Halpern tells the story of Marti Miller and Sue McDonald, the daughters who were switched at birth , and the many complications that came with learning the truth. And so that's why I started sending them a copy of our Christmas letter. And he did, in fact, say some hurtful things. They said that was a cop-out. We're devoting the full hour today to what happened to these two families. This is not my family. Jake Halpern. It took an awful long time and I'm sorry for. Well, when your husband said to you, this baby's cute, let's keep it. And she kept it quiet all those years. Thanks, as always, to our program's co-founder Mr. Torey Malatia. Over the years, Mrs. Miller would do or say things concerning the girls, things that just seemed strange to Kay. You know, she's part of that odd family, you know? But later, the two churches merged. And the family's relationship with Dr. Deslack was no small thing either. All she could do was hope that maybe if she dropped enough hints, calling the girls, sisters and such, Kay would eventually realize on her own what had happened. Our website, thisamericanlife.org. Forty two years after the switch, Reverend Miller finally laid eyes on Sue at the McDonald's wedding anniversary party. Did you have enough? Even so, he asked her for forgiveness again and again. Occasionally she'd break down and cry. I can't tell you how hard it was, but I got me all along. At one point toward the end of the party, as Sue stood nearby, Marti started talking about the room that she had grown up in in the Miller household. I thought that was such a ridiculous thing to say. She would push the dresser and the cedar chest against the door. But that didn't seem so strange. And there were a lot of kids too. There were a few years there. She grew up with Sue, after all, and she's not actually related to her or to her kids. I thought it was just Rudy being Rudy, you know, he just has crazy ideas and he dreams these things up. So he said, I don't need a DNA test. And then she's going to say, well, I don't need that daughter anymore. She had given birth two years prior, to a girl. There was nothing I didn't have anything to do with it. Dear Martha and Sue, have you ever suspected or been told that we took home the baby that belonged to Kay and Bob McDonald and they later took home the baby that belonged to us? And the Millers show her pictures of her other relatives. When your husband said to you, this baby's cute, let's keep it, did you agree with him immediately or was there a little bit of arguing back and forth over what to do? Mr MacDonald's health didn't allow it. I don't think your sister's yours. She was a married mother of three living in Michigan, where her husband worked as a chemist. Reverend Miller had once been pastor there, so he and Mrs. Miller were invited. And I'm not one to borrow trouble. Robert Mays' first wife Barbara died not long after when little Kimberly was just two years old. Oscar-winning actress Marlee Matlin is back in the spotlight on ABC Family's "Switched at Birth," which will have its winter premiere on Tuesday. The evening just ended up being kind of baffling for everyone involved, since only Mrs. Miller knew what was going on. Pudd'nhead Wilson. But it was hard, Marti says, to be on the receiving end of this sudden adamant truth-telling. Mrs. Miller and Kay McDonald were actually in different churches. So instead of going in the hall and going out, we would crawl through the register. Marti was also married, also had three kids. When she got on the phone, I was just totally blown away, by the way, she pronounced her words were identical with the way my mother talked. You're their kid, you're in their family. What are you supposed to be with each other? This American Life often broadcasts short fiction or essays that touch on absurd or deeply imaginative, but this single-story episode proved that sometimes, truth is stranger than fiction. Try keep it short so that it is easy for people to scan your page. Jun, 05, 2022 Mrs. Miller's most ambitious scheme happened after the girls graduated from high school, when they were about to be 18. She I did feel in the beginning like she was taking my place in my family, and that was odd, very odd, and sometimes I don't know exactly what her relationship is with my sisters. Sue is ours. A child is a child. She remembers Marty always lightening the mood in their house as a kid. That's sort of spooked Marty, so she left it alone. This is Sue reading a letter she got some time ago from her new found Miller sister Faith, though there are many, many good things about our family and parents and being raised by that family. Unbelievable Intentional Swap. But that's all she said. She wasn't malicious. Bay meets Emmett outside a college party she got dragged into when he alerts her not to be in that neighborhood late at night. He did not want her to push me out of the family. And so she took one of the programs from it and she mailed it to me. That sort of spooked Marti, so she left it alone. So she said unless there's a real reason that you need to know that, I don't recommend that you dig into it. Later that same day, Sue drove to the McDonalds', to the parents she'd grown up with. Sue knew her mother had never been a big fan of the Millers ever since they met.
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